Charlie Sheen, the true Wizard of Id

I’ve never had a Charlie Sheen moment. It’s disgraceful.

Charlie Sheen in Ferris Bueller

My favorite Charlie moment: As a stoner in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off"

But really, I’ve never been so full of confidence, so monumentally convinced of my perfection, and it’s just sad. If Tiger Blood was really what’s doing it, I’d say “Let’s go get some,” but I love tigers and don’t want to see their blood being savagely removed from their bodies. Of course, they’d probably rip our faces off if we came within 20 yards of them with a syringe.

Now THAT would be a funny sitcom moment.

While part of me thinks this whole Sheen fiasco is an act, I also see a man running totally on Id, or as defines, “The personality component made up of unconscious psychic energy that works to satisfy basic urges, needs, and desires. The id operates based on the pleasure principle, which demands immediate gratification of needs.”

Sounds about right, eh?

I know this is going to surprise some of you, but prepare yourselves: The Garish Chicken isn’t as pure as dewy children’s tears. I’ve seen my share of train wrecks, and been a partial one a few times. I’ve had close friends whose lives have spiraled out of control, one in particular. She abused drugs for years, and when she got “clean” (I use quotes because I’ll never know if she really truly was clean) she became erratic and unbelievably Id-dy. It was all about her. She’s always had a mean streak, but it got meaner and more prevalent. She became a nuisance. She was out of control. She eventually started using drugs again, maybe not to the level she had, and she was intolerable. We are no longer friends.

Charlie Sheen will lose a lot of friends over his Id addiction, and if he is truly clean, I suspect he’s going through what this former friend went through.

I really do hope he doesn’t completely lose custody of his children, and I hope a great majority of this behavior is just a cry for attention or need for publicity. Maybe it’s a talented agent’s ploy to get his client in the spotlight. Maybe it’s a Joaquin Phoenix-esque plot for a documentary. Who knows?

All I know is, I am ready to hear about somebody else, someone who’s fully using all three parts of their personality.  And really, if you’re going to use an animal-based product, shouldn’t it always be Sex Panther?

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Filed under Brain Disorders, Fun!, General Nonsense

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